RED RANGER

As my boys have learned in their different classes (church and school) sometimes you need to just sit (Indian style) with your arms and legs crossed and be quiet....hence the "criss cross applesauce"
Where the applesauce comes from I do not know. I guess it just gives it a nice ring? Anyway, I've been just criss crossing and meditating on what to blog this week ..I haven't had any winner of ideas. I hope my blog powers weren't taken away from me when I left "THE OFFICE." Surely not??

Well, I did start my new job this week, and I really like it a lot. I have been keeping busy with that. Also, if you will read the blog of "SHOW ME STATE OF MIND"...You will see how she thought that Red Ranger was busy this week polishing his Red Ranger Boots. (or as she put it busy polishing his Red Ranger / Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader Boots! Thanks for that missy!
Anyway, I did find it humorous.
We celebrated Parkers 4th B-day today at a new local park. Pizza, Cake and non alcoholic libations were enjoyed by all! About 15 kids were there to help celebrate the festivities!
I came home and made about 7lbs of potato salad. I made the 7 layer salad for a get together I "THOUGHT" was last week....it wasn't. It is tomorrow, and I AM sure of it this time! That really was a pain.
Well, peace out!

Posted by TOM at 5:15 PM | Permalink | Comments

Manana Time...the meaning you ask? Well, back when I was working at Delta we had passengers, friends and co-workers (from Mexico, south and central America etc) who would often be on, lets just say, "their own time schedule." The time schedule was....there wasn't one. With that being said let me explain my day.

I awoke at 730AM to be ready for the young, Mexican guy laying the tile in our bathrooms who was suppose to come at 8:00AM. Well, at least I thought he was coming at 8:00AM. Let's fast forward to 11:00AM. He is still not here. HELLO! Or should I say HOLA!
Anyway, he finally showed up at 1120AM. I was not too happy. Also, his price was figured on the 100 sq ft they had measured last week, and this was for the total of both bathrooms. This seemed not right to me, and I had done a little measuring of my own. With some "prompting" I asked them to remeasure. Now we were at 60 sq feet. I mentioned about the price that had originally been figured on 100 sq feet. Their unique response was, "we added a few feet so you could have a few extra tiles in case some broke." HMMMMM Well, that is good, but I don't think you will need as many tiles for 40 sq feet. I HOPE you don't plan on breaking THAT many. Also, labor costs should be figured on the 60 sq feet not the 100sq ft, right? Plus 5 to 10 extra tiles tops would only be needed, right? Give me a break! They also thought my tile was too thin. Later, they said, "No problem with the tile senior." HMM, I am not feeling too confident here.. Well, there were many more events that didn't leave us too warm and fuzzy. We chose to say Thanks but NO THANKS. Being 31/2 hours late, being off on measurements by 40 sq feet, and all the other guacamole.....Just could not handle it. I said thanks, but not going to need their services. Oh, by the way the GREAT .50 cent tile is not too thin. I found that out later in the day. YEAH!

Our Sunday school class is having a big get together tomorrow. We are bringing a salad. So, while Michelle and the boys were out I made the 7 layer salad. You know the one with cheese, mayo, eggs, red onion, peas? Well, some friends of our added some dried cranberries in the salad. It sounds weird, but it tastes really good. Anyway, it took forever cutting and prepping and getting all the junk together.... I finished making the salad when we found out the Sunday school get together is NOT tomorrow. It is NEXT week. When will the day get better?

In closing I would like to ask everyone one question. Do you think the freak they picked up in Bangkok is the actual killer of JonBenet? I don't think he is. I do know he is a total freak of nature. When I saw him on TV he had his pants pulled up so far he looked like Pee Wee Hermon or Steve Urkel. Well, anyway I didn' t know if there were others that thought the same as me.
I know tomorrow will have to be better than today.
LATER

Posted by TOM at 3:38 PM | Permalink | Comments

Yes, it is true. I am no longer employed at "THE OFFICE" / The Asian version........
Tuesday was my last day there. I am truly blessed and happy. Queen had continued to be very snobbish and hadn't said anything about my new job. NADA! On the final day my boss took us all to lunch as a "goodbye gesture" to me. We all went to a restaurant that is close to THE OFFICE, Anne and Bills. This is a restaurant in Forest Park that serves your basic southern/home cook'n. During dinner someone asked about my job, and she surprisingly joined the conversation by asking "where will your new office be located?" This was quite humorous to me, because for the 2 weeks I worked out my notice she had not said one word to me much less say ANYTHING about me leaving THE OFFICE as well as my new job. Very strange... Well, maybe they can replace my position with a therapist. They ALL could really use one.
Anyway, back to lunch.....this restaurant serves those large green onions that have the huge white bulb part on the end. My coworker from THE OFFICE was very intrigued by this unique, southern tradition. People actually pick them up and eat them as is? Yes, I answered. I asked our server to bring some for all THE ASIANS at the table. They wanted to try THE ONION. They all kept referring to it as "THE ONION." Well, THE ONIONS were brought, and they all were holding it up and nibbling on it as if they were eating a piece of fried chicken/drumstick from KFC. Their faces were fun to watch. What I really enjoyed was seeing the family sitting at the table next to us. I could only imagine what they were thinking......They were probably thinking "look at all those foreigners with that one American, and he is feeding them all green onions, and letting them have a taste of southern culture." Anyway, that family was fun to watch as they were laughing at our table. Fortunately, none of my coworkers from THE OFFICE saw them at the other table.
Well, after lunch I was able to finish up the short day and leave at 2pm! This was a good thing.

Wednesday through Friday I will be "getting stuff done" around the house. NO, this is not a honey do list! This is a self made/self do list! I feel very happy so far at all I've gotten done. I don't know why I am not always this into getting stuff done. I've cut grass, cleaned the garage, clean the siding on the house, gone shopping for some new work clothes and purchased new tiles for our bathrooms. We will be putting the tile down in the bathrooms this Saturday.
This is the best part. I had looked at several places, and was going to be able to buy the 12" tile for $1.20 ish each....We were looking at different places trying to decide which we wanted...This was not going too well. Well, just for the heck of it we went to Lowes (knowing they wouldn't have any better choice OR PRICES) WE WERE WRONG. We saw tile for the same price as we had seen before, but we didn't like any of them...... We finally found one we both liked, but this stupid tile was double the price! (about $2.25 per tile) We had both of the little darlings with us, and were tired and yada yada yada...You know the rest, right? The next words out of our mouths were "let's just get this even though it costs more. We like it right???" We both were at peace with this some what stupid and non-frugal decision.
The Griffin clan made its way up to the cashier (with the boys riding on the cart with the tiles which added for some great, free entertainment) It was almost like a feature film shown in slow motion. The cashier picked up the scanning gun. She looked at us and smiled. She scanned the bar code on the boxes of the tiles. The total price appeared on the register. It couldn't be. This had to be a mistake. She said, "no it isn't, they are on sale. Each tile cost 55 CENTS !!! We were very excited, and I know the cashier thought we were freaks.
The moral of the story is.............well, there isn't one! It is just fun that these simple, simple and simple things can be free entertainment.
I know I won't be able to BLOG about THE OFFICE, but selling insurance won't be too boring either. A friend of mine was talking to some clients in their home about insurance, and this couple started kissing and one thing lead to another. Yes, my friend was still there sitting right in front of them. Needless to say, they were somewhat frisky in front of him, and gave him a show. So, I am sure I will be able to share fun blogs regarding the fun world of insurance. Stay tuned!

Posted by TOM at 1:31 PM | Permalink | Comments

Drive through the drive thru in reverse and let your passenger order.

Ask prices of everything on the menu then order something that you did not ask the price for.

Pretend like your window is broken. Tell the employee this. Order with your door open, pay with your door open. Roll down window and take food through the window.

Go to McDonalds and demand a big breakfast at 11:30 at night. Put up a fight.

Pay for a large order in pennies and nickels unwrapped.

Order in another language. Be careful what neighborhood you are in.

When asked if they can take your order, tell them you are just window shopping and drive on.

Laugh sadistically when asked if you would like ketchup.

Ask how they fit into that little box.

If they make you wait, make them wait when they come back on.

Demand to speak to the manager. When he comes on, complain that you did not like the way the employee said "May I take your order?"

When asked if they can take your order say "No, why can't I take yours?"

If they ask you to wait, order anyway and keep doing it till they yell at you.

Pretend like your car broke down. Ask for assistance in moving it. When they come out, drive away.

Tell them you have to use the bathroom.

Order a cup of water and two napkins. That's it.

Don't order when they come on. Just sit there. If a line forms behind you, get out of the car and cause a scene.

When they hand you your food, hand them a bag back with all the trash from your car in it.

Just stare at them when you pay and get your food. Don't break your stare.

Honk your horn the whole way through the line.
________________________________________________________________

FINALLY, THIS IS NOT YOUR NORMAL DRIVE THRU.....

Posted by TOM at 12:45 PM | Permalink | Comments

This blog has NO meaning or purpose...........I just thought it would be fun to go back in time and see the great pictures of the famous, American Idol...
Mr. William Hung. I so miss hearing him sing "She Bangs." That was some great music.

Posted by TOM at 5:08 PM | Permalink | Comments

Two priests decided to go to Hawaii on vacation. They were determined to make this a real vacation escape by not wearing anything that would identify them as clergy.
As soon as the plane landed they headed for a store and bought some outrageous shorts, shirts and sandals. The next morning they went to the beach dressed in their tourist garb.They were sitting on beach chairs, enjoying a drink, the sunshine and the scenery when a drop dead gorgeous blonde wearing a string bikini came walking straight towards them.
They couldn't help but stare. As the blonde passed them she smiled and said, "Good Morning, Father. Good Morning, Father," nodding and addressing each of them individually; then she passed on by. They were both stunned. How in the world did she know they were priests?
So the next day, they went back to the store and bought even more outrageous outfits. These were so loud you could hear them before you saw them. Once again, in their new attire, they settled on the beach in their chairs to enjoy the sunshine. After a while, the same gorgeous blonde,this time topless with just a thong bikini, taking her sweet time, came walking toward them. Again she nodded at each of them, she said, "Good morning, Father.Good morning, Father," and started to walk away.
One of the Priests couldn't stand it any longer and said, "Just a minute young lady." "Yes, Father?", she said. "We are priests and proud of it, but I have to know, how in the world did you know we are priests, dressed as we are?"
"Father, it's me, Sister Margaret."

Posted by TOM at 10:24 AM | Permalink | Comments

For those that don't know our beloved Congresswoman Cynthia Mckinney - Georgia 4th Congressional District... she did not win re-election last night. I am just fine with this!

We will miss her many faces, hairdos and all the controversy that followed her. She was great for talk radio. Let us now take a moment to reflect.....

Posted by TOM at 6:44 AM | Permalink | Comments

I found some of the old "Deep Thoughts by Jack Handy" that use to appear on Saturday Night Live. I hope you enjoy them.

It takes a big man to cry, but it takes a bigger man to laugh at that man.

I hope if dogs ever take over the world, and they chose a king, they don'tjust go by size, because I bet there are some Chihuahuas with some good ideas.

When you go in for a job interview, I think a good thing to ask is if they ever press charges.

To me, boxing is like a ballet, except there's no music, no choreography, and the dancers hit each other.

Better not take a dog on the space shuttle, because if he sticks his headout when you're coming home his face might burn up.

Laurie got offended that I used the word "puke." But to me, that's what her dinner tasted like.

I think one way the cops could make money would be to hold a murder weapons sale. Many people could really use used ice picks.

If I ever opened a trampoline store, I don't think I'd call it Trampo-Land, because you might think it was a store for tramps, which is not the impression we are trying to convey with our store. On the other hand, we would not prohibit tramps from browsing, or testing the trampolines, unless a tramp's gyrations seemed to be getting out of control.

A funny thing to do is, if you're out hiking and your friend gets bitten by a poisonous snake, tell him you're going to go for help, then go about ten feet and pretend that *you* got bit by a snake. Then start an argument with him about who's going to go get help. A lot of guys will start crying. That's why it makes you feel good when you tell them it was just a joke.

Posted by TOM at 11:21 AM | Permalink | Comments

Though I have not seen this movie I am sure it will be hilarious...The plot you ask? I am sure there really is not one. Do they ever have plots in these movies by former SNL cast members turned movie stars? Remember Molly Shannon's "SUPERSTAR?" Now that was a true, American classic. HA
Anyway, I am sure that Talladega Nights is no exception! I am sure this will be a movie that our kids will study in literature class someday...

Posted by TOM at 8:16 AM | Permalink | Comments

Saturday was a pretty normal day, so I thought. Michelle and I went out to eat Saturday night, and while finishing up my tasty steak IT HAPPENED AGAIN! Yes, meat was stuck in my esophogas. I could breath and I could talk, but I could not swallow anything...not even a drop of water. Knowing what was going to happen I drove just up Tara Blvd to Southern Regional Hospital, and I walked into the ER. Yes, this has become too common of a ritual for me. (I think the 5th time) The normal stuff happens: they get copies of license and drivers license and take your temperature yada yada yada....(Good thing I really am not dying, because we really know we have to get all that paper work...never mind me I am just choking, people!!)

I was finally taken back to my room which I shared with another patient on the other side of the little curtain. She was pregnant, and they were trying to hear the baby's heart beat and had the machined WAY turned up. It kind'a sounded like a loud, bad, garage, rock band....It was very annoying. It finally stopped. (No, not the heart beat which they heard but the loud noise I kept hearing from the machine)

They usually have to call the G.I. doctor and they come in and open up the G.I. lab and down my throat they go. (pushing down or retrieving the meat stuck in my throat) Don't worry they always give me GOOD STUFF, so you really wouldn't care if they wanted to drive a school bus down your throat. My "dinner" while at the ER started with some Ativan. This was for "anxiety"... Like you wouldn't be anxious if you couldn't swallow a drop of water without it coming up !!!! Let's just say it makes you kind'a get cozy and start to enjoy the lack of comfort from the cold, metal gurney. I hear the awaited news I longed for, "The doctor has been mobilized." What is this a SCI-FI movie?? (which meant the doctor, that was on call and enjoying his expensive dinner downtown, is on his way to yank this piece of steak out of the idiots throat..that would be me.) He finally gets there and they are basically gonna go down with some tube (that has a camera on the end of it to take pictures which I can show you..HA) and yank the meat out or push it down into my stomach. What a pleasant visual. Anyway, before doing this the good stuff is administered. Demerol is added to my IV. What joys this added to my soul. No, I am not a junkie, but I do enjoy an occasional dose of demerol. (of course under a physicians care only) This makes you happy and not care that they about to come down your throat with a rota-rooter!! Anyway, I was not being still and wouldn't stop talking even with all that medicine. Imagine that?? Well, after some versed, I was officially in LA-LA Land...

We finally got home around 1:00AM....This is a real fun way to spend your Saturday evenings, you know? Anyway, I guess I will have to go the doctor and have them stretch my esophogas again. That is just too wrong. It's a hereditary thing. Maybe they can replace my "innards" with stretch-rubber stuff....I am over the late ER visits...

I HOPE YOU ENJOY THE PICTURES MY SICK WIFE TOOK OF ME IN MY TIME OF NEED AND SICKNESS...SHE CLAIMS THAT I BEGGED HER TO TAKE THEM..WHO WOULD YOU BELIEVE??? WE KNOW SHE IS PICTURE-TAKING HAPPY.......

LATER PEOPLE

AND REMEMBER.....CHEW YOUR FOOD THOROUGHLY

Posted by TOM at 3:14 PM | Permalink | Comments

Yes, I too can pass a background check!! This was just part of the process for my new job. I told this to my uncle (Tim C.) to which he replied, "Obviously the check wasn't thorough enough" Thanks for that word of ministry!
Anyway, I am excited to get going and MOVE'N ON! Life is too short. You gotta do what's good for you and what makes you happy, you know? Which makes me realize a few things I would like to do while I am alive....(No, the doctor hasn't given me any bad news....and NO probably most of these won't happen, but one can only wish, right?)

1. I want to go to the Great Wall of China

2. Have my own cooking show on the Food Network

3. Be a guest on Jay Leno (I don't know the reason I would be on the show, but I guess there doesn't have to be a reason when you are dreaming, right?)

4. Record a CD ( now that would finally be cool...now I know who I would work with ..where I would record etc ..now anyone wanting to donate $ to help this come true...you know where I am..HA)

5. Address The Senate & The Congress! (They would all have to be present, and YES, Hillary Clinton and Ted Kennedy would have to do what I say!!)

6. Sleep in the Lincoln Bedroom and have full access to anywhere in the White House.

7. Fly in Air Force One (I promise I won't take anything off the plane like the Clintons did!!)

8. Hang out with Sean Hannity and be a regular on his show. He is cool.

9. Sing at Carnegie Hall AGAIN! (you heard me people! been there done that...ok, it was with a chorale...this time maybe solo?? HA)

10. Be a Blue Angels pilot for the day (with the understanding that there would be NO WAY that I could crash....

Posted by TOM at 1:38 PM | Permalink | Comments

THIS IS JUST A LITTLE PIECE OF "MOVING ART" WE SAW THE OTHER DAY WHILE WE WERE DRIVING DOWN THE ROAD. I REALLY DON'T EVEN KNOW WHERE TO BEGIN WITH THIS ONE.....

Posted by TOM at 2:30 PM | Permalink | Comments

Can you slam a revolving door?

Why does it say "shake well" on ketchup bottles, but not on ketchup packets?


Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?

What happens if every team in the NFL goes 8-8?

If a Jewish person goes to court and is asked to put their right hand on the Bible, do they use a Torah instead?


Who WAS in the kitchen with Dina?

Can a school teacher give a homeless child homework?

If the pope goes to the bathroom, is it considered holy crap?

Can a cross-eyed teacher control his pupils?

Is eating a mermaid considered cannibalism?

If "Fantasy Island" really granted wishes, why wasn't Tatto 6'6"?

Can bald people get a hair line fracture?

Why don't you ever hear about gruntled employees?

Can atheists get insurance for acts of God?

If Barbie is so popular, then why do you have to buy her friends?

What would Geronimo say if he jumped out of an airplane?

Can fat people go skinny dipping?

Do you need a silencer if you are going to shoot a mime?

(The above picture has nothing to do with these thoughts....I just liked it)

Posted by TOM at 4:33 PM | Permalink | Comments