ain't nothing but a diet coke
Let me first start off by saying why is it the little things always get you so torked? Let me explain. Today, I went to a local Chinese restaurant "Empire of China" for lunch. (read it and weep Tracey Kirksey...yum yum) I ordered the lunch special that includes all the normal stuff and comes with a tea. I asked to change the drink to a diet coke. (I know you are thinking diet coke with Chinese food? That is like eating a snickers with a diet coke, right?) Well, I like diet cokes so off me!! Anyway, the server advised me it would be 25 cents to change from tea to a coke. I said fine. Finally, my food came, but they had given me fried rice. I had ordered steamed rice. My egg roll never came, and when I asked them about it they did bring it to me as I was taking my last bite of my lunch. Sometimes you never can win!! I thought for the whole 25 cents I paid the diet coke would have refills abounding... NOT!! I was suck'n ice baby!! Oh yeah, this is the best part!! When ordering the food she told me it would be an additional 25 cents for the drink change, and while eating 2 different people at 2 different times stopped by the table to tell me of the additional 25 cents charge for the upgrade from tea to coke. I guess this is what you call a Chinese Biggie Size?? Well, I go to pay, and the SAME SERVER that took my order had to advise me again about the 25 cents!! I stink'n got it people!! At this point I was willing to give them a whole roll of quarters to shut them up. Well, lunch did taste good, but was very mentally exhausting.
I know I said I worked at the Asian version of the NBC hit show "THE OFFICE." Well, I do!!! I will not go into everything now....because you would be reading all night. However, let me just share a glimpse into the life of my dysfunctional office.
Well, there is a Chinese lady next to me. Due to the nature of our work we have TONS of manila folders on our desks. I often look up and she is staring at me (with her eyes just peeking out over the folders) and
she is smiling at me. Very scary. She is sweet, but hard to understand. She does speak English and Japanese (like everyone in the office, but her Japanese is VERY hard to understand...and this is what we speak 99% of the time) She speaks Japanese with a Chinese accent. YES! There IS such a thing. She likes to take 5 minute naps from time to time. I had decided that I will get a picture of without her knowing (or anyone else for that matter) Yes, I know it is sick, but you don't know the stress I've been under at work!! I need something to make me smile.Well, I got a picture today!! It was like a stake out. It was almost like the photographers from the Enquirer trying to get the first picture of Tom Cruise (HELLO I STAND ON SOFA'S WHEN ON TV) and Kayte Holmes' stupid, Scientology, freak of a baby!! I kind'a felt like a national geographic photographer in Africa trying to get a picture of the most wild and extinct animal during mating season. I was on a mission!! I was very sneaky. I was very proud of my success. I will try next time for a picture with better focus. Please enjoy the "candid" sleeping picture of "Yang, the Chinese" and the one I asked her to let me take.
As a final thought to my weird, work world.....Take a look at the picture taken today at my office of the clocks. WHAT TIME IS IT? Even though they are all different time zones the minutes should all be the same. (only the hours should be different, right??) Not at my office. This kind'a gives you a glimpse into "MY OFFICE" As we say in the south.............."everyone is walking around with one nugget short of a happy meal" (or short one piece of sushi from a Japanese box lunch) OH YEAH, next time I will have to tell you about when I was trying to explain to them, "nugget short a happy meal, elevator doesn't go to the top floor and those type of expressions..." That was a fun day!! Plus Chinese (as I affectionally like to refer to her behind her back) and my boss like to talk about their bathroom habits. IN DETAIL PEOPLE!! (this is NOT normal for Japanese either !)
LATER
LOL....Oh Tommy, I always knew you were a little sideways. I'm cracking up.
And what is so wrong with a Diet Coke and Chinese....or a Diet Coke and Mexican....or a Diet Coke and more Mexican. I see nothin', absolutely nothin' wrong with that.
Posted by
Jennifer |
7:04 PM
I am laughing out loud! Yeah, the extra charge harrassment is what you get for calling me and rubbing it in that you were at Empire. I called back and told them to harrass you! Just Kidding.
I am LOVING your profile photo. I bet you wear the suit at night for Michelle, too, don't you?!
Never a dull day at the office with you and the Chinese/Japanese people! I bet they think you are a trip!
Posted by
Tracey |
7:19 PM
By the way, I LOVE the title of this blog! Reminds me of the days Cho and I worked together!
Posted by
Tracey |
7:21 PM
Your blog is hilarious on so many levels! John at Empire must be hard up for business. What city exactly is "Chicag"?
You're not right.
Posted by
chrome dome |
7:23 PM
That is another thing!!! CHICAG??
They can't even spell CHICAGO right. This is so the tip of the iceberg.."Don't even get me started....don't even get me started"
Posted by
TOM |
7:30 PM
Tom, Empire of China is one of my clients at work and I have heard from someone else that the service at the location you are talking about isn't that good. I'm sure John would be interested to know your experience today......who knows......you may get a complimentary meal...AND Diet Coke!
Dianne
Posted by
Anonymous |
8:39 PM
Tom,
All I can say is -- you may require therapy. I was laughing out loud. Jenny the dog came to check on me. She just stood and glared at me...
For the record - diet coke goes with everything. The Frontera ( mexican) people hook me up with an IV and go on thier merry way....
Posted by
Julie |
7:20 AM
Tommy - diet Coke is the ONLY drink! You are crazy and made me laugh!
Beth
Posted by
Anonymous |
12:45 PM